making friends when old(er).

making friends when old(er).
conversation magazine: making friends when you’re an adult is tough. adults tend to find it harder to trust new people. and older people are generally more afraid of getting rejected than younger people are
  • older ppl tend to be more cautious about making new friends bc they’re been rejected in the past. they tend to understand that becoming friends w/ someone involves being vulnerable
  • besides trust, there’s also the issue of time. making and maintaining friendship takes time between work and family, it can be hard to make time for friends
as hard as it is, says having friends when you’re older is important for your health! it keeps the immune system and the mind healthy. if you’re looking for new pals, taking up a new hobby or joining an online community is a good place to start
  • block off time in your calendar to explore new hobbies or interests that could expose you to new ppl -- maybe it’s taking online classes, maybe it’s joining a gym
  • once you’ve put yourself in a situation w/ other ppl, don’t be afraid to talk to them one-on-one
  • if you met someone you’d like to be friends w/, schedule a follow-up event like getting coffee together
the altantic writes that making friends in your 40s is a lot like dating: you gotta find people who you vibe with, who are also willing to commit themselves to maintaining a friendship. it’s challenging -- but worth it
  • there are some ppl that you just won’t get along with. others aren’t willing to make time for friendship
  • and some aren’t willing to let you join their group of friends
  • but if you’re able to find someone you really connect with, friendship in midlife is magical. it expands your worldview!
ny magazine: and like dating apps, friendship apps are also an option to meet new people online. an expert said you should give ’em a shot
  • apps like bumble bff and vina are kinda like tinder, but for friends
  • and an expert approves! there are also websites that help connect people w/ similar hobbies
  • don’t let anxiety stop you -- making friends is hard, but worth it
jane fonda said making friends when you’re 60+ is all about having the courage to pursue potential friends --
  • she said when she met sally field, she intentionally pursued friendship w/ her by asking her out to lunch
  • field joked that fonda was *very* insistent on maintaining their friendship
the nyt: maintaining existing friendships is important, too. reach out to an old friend buried in the depths of your contacts sometimes
  • first off, romantic love isn’t more important than platonic love -- both are important for living a fulfilled life!
  • even tho rejection is scary, the more effort you put into getting to know someone, the more likely they’ll be willing to give friendship a shot
  • simple things, like reaching out to old friends w/ a text, really does matter -- it improves the health of your friendships
otoh, cxo media says losing friends as you age is natural: older people tend to be more involved with their family and work life. a shrinking social circle isn’t always a bad thing. after all, quality > quantity
  • losing superficial or toxic friendships can have a positive impact on your life
  • fewer friends means you have more time to dedicate to friendships that really matter. a few deeper platonic connections are generally better than a lot of shallow friendships
  • a shrinking social circle also gives you more time to improve yourself -- that’s not a bad thing!
maybe making adult friends is as simple as. . . walking? la times writes about “la girls who walk”, a group that takes monthly walks together as a way to meet new people in the city
  • even tho the group is called “girls” who walk, gay men and nonbinary people are welcome too
  • the women in the group said they joined to make new friends. many felt isolated during covid or after moving to a new city
  • the group doesn’t just walk -- they also host other group activities like painting and dinner events